Where should I start... how do I start... literally I just never know. What I meant to say... oh sorry I don't understand...oh is that what you meant...can you be a bit slower for me... oh that's what it says... sorry I can't spell that....how did you do that?
I live with dyslexia. With the number of words, I can say, speak and say let's put it simple and simple is the way that suits me... it's difficult! However, I know there are huge benefits that come from difficulties. There is a myth (true or not, I believe it) that when you lack something then your will be better at something else. They say that when you are blind another sense like your hearing increases. I believe that my dyslexia may have decreased how intellectual I could be but instead, it increased my creativity.
Let me tell you a secret, I would choose creativity every time!!
As a child, I learnt to run before I learnt to walk (even if this was just crashing into everything) at a ridiculously young age, however, speech and talking came much later.
My mum always tells me how she spent hours and hours trying to teach me colours, names and numbers but I was just clueless. In school, I remember I was always put in the back of the class with paper and colour crayons while the other children were learning. I never understood why but I never complained as colouring was much more fun! My parents were brought in after school and as always I was put at the back of the room with colouring crayons and that's when the school said that they couldn't help me there was something just not right, they said that my parents need to get me tested. So they did.
When they found out that I was severely dyslexic my mum was absolutely distraught she thought I was either going to die or was just going to be useless for the rest of my life because you have to remember when I was younger there was no information on dyslexia or help. My family were absolutely shaken up with the act that I had dyslexia but my elder sister was so academic, she was top of class A start 'perfect' student and child.
My family kept it all hush and researched like crazy for private clinical help and schools that could help children like me. So I had to move schools who could deal with my 'needs' and they found a private teacher which i had to see every week. I still suffer from pretty bad travel sickness and as a child lets put it nicely... I puked even when I went over a speed bump in a car. This private lady lived 3 hours away from where we lived and she was the only one that could help me (this is what I was told anyway) so every time I had to go to this teacher I dreaded it as the lessons were so hard I ended up crying frustration and puking because the journey was so long and bumpy.
A passing comment my grandfather said to my family is ' There is no hope. She won't be anywhere but stacking shelves for the rest of her life'
There is nothing wrong with stacking shelves it's a job and the most educated people can be doing that role for any reason they want.
FUCK YOU! You watch me go and prove you wrong!
Now lets fast forward to now.
I have a very good job, left home young (18) , got my own flat in Manchester, starting my own media company, 11 GCSE'S, 3 A levels and a first-class degree.
Living with dyslexia is hard, very hard. Each day is a struggle because, what you find easy I find hard and most days I have to go through feeling extremely embarrassed because someone finds its funny when I've written, read or said something wrong. Which I thought was right.
However, it doesn't stop us instead it makes us stronger mentally, emotionally, creatively and even intellectually.
It's a superpower!
PS- I've had to use Grammarly to write this, get someone checks it and took me 2 hours to write. I hope you enjoy each word because each word has so much energy and time out into it for it to make sense to you!